The Silent Room

I went a little bit overboard and splurged on a dinner at Sushi King the other day, so until my cheque deposit is cleared next week, I’ll be practically broke this weekend. The rest of the family have either gone outstation or back to my hometown, leaving me to care for the house by myself again.

Not that I mind, but it’s just I’d have to find ways to feed myself for the next few days. Fortunately, I’m pretty good at cooking [for my own taste, at least] and the house is pretty much stocked with raw stuff – culinary playthings for a pair of idle hands.

So I gathered whatever I could find, and fixed myself something pretty fancy tonight. Here’s what I had for dinner.

Recipe after the jump.

Bachelor’s Salisbury Steak
These ingredients can be easily found in your mother’s kitchen. If such is not the case, go look for them in someone else’s mother’s kitchen. Your mother’s mother’s kitchen should be a good alternative.

1. Some ground beef/chicken [approx. 250mg]
2. 1 egg
3. Corn flour [1/4 cup]
4. Onions, minced [2 tablespoons]
5. Garlic, minced [2 tablespoons]
6. Breadcrumbs [1/4 cup]
7. Cheese crackers, crushed [1/4 cup]
8. Oyster sauce [1 tablespoon]
9. BBQ sauce/Worcestershire sauce [1 tablespoon]
10. Pepper and any random powder herbs and spices [the keyword here is 'random']

Instructions:
The execution of this dish requires an IQ level above that of a frigid garden snail. If you are not in possession of one, please place an order from your local hardware store for some strong rope and suspend yourself, preferably from a strongly secured ceiling fan with the rope tied around your neck.

1. Mix all the ingredients in a large bowl and mix in one teaspoon of cooking oil [butter or margarine is ok, too]. That should smooth the mix and make it easier to shape.
2. Heat a skillet/frying pan/grill/any suitable flat cooking surface and coat it with some cooking oil [butter or margarine is ok, too]
3. Clump your meat mix together like a ball, and roll it onto the pan, shaping it into a 1-inch-thick patty as you cook.
4. Flip it over every once in a while to make sure you cook both sides.
5. When both sides are well browned, transfer the steak onto some kitchen towels to drain any excess oil.
6. Serve warm with whatever you want. I just made some fries, poured out some baked beans and added a dollop of mayonnaise. Best served with brown sauce and baked potato salad.

Now, let me see what else I can scrounge up from the kitchen. My freezer contents look like a collection of fossils from an Ice Age excavation…