The Silent Room

I’m feeling extra generous today.

Since I’m in a good mood, I decided to do you a favour. Yes, this is – again – due to the most awesomest lunch ever. I shall today, teach you how to make yourself your very own Chicken Salsa Kebab! This time, in a systematically numerised recipe guide complete with peekchures XD

Here we go, the ingredients are [in case you can't tell from the photo]:

1. Oyster sauce
2. Ground pepper
3. Italian Mixed Herbs[*]
4. Maggi Salsa Chili Sauce
5. Garlic and shallot
6. A piece of fried chicken [any type of meat will do, actually]
7. Left over fries from last night’s McD takeaway[*]
8. Sausage [the one shown is cheese-filled chicken, but anything will do][*]
9. Lebanese flat bread
10. Cooking oil [not in the picture cause the bottle is so damn huge]
11. Some mayonnaise [not in the picture cause I forgot to take it out from the fridge when shooting.]

[*] These items are optional. They only serve to make you drool and make the kebab taste better.

1. First things first, chop up the garlic and shallot nicely lke so;

2. Next, cut up whatever meats you got. In this case, it’s the sausage. As for the fried chicken, wash your hands clean and rip off every bit of flesh from the bone. Use a knife if necessary.

3. Heat up some oil in a wok and sautee the chopped garlic and shallot over a medium fire.

4. Once the aroma has risen from the sautee and the shallots turn semi transparent [somewhat], turn down the heat and toss in everything else. Yes, EVERYTHING. Just in case you still don’t know what everythiing means, here’s another photo.

5. Turn up the heat and stir it around. Make sure everything is covered in sauce. You don’t want any unflavoured bits in your roll. Keep stir-frying for about 3 minutes before turning off the fire. Your ticket to heaven should look [somewhat] like this.

[Okay, okay, I added the lens flare just to make it look gay. Shut up already.]

6. Heat up a flat plate and toast the bread over a high fire like so. Careful not to toast for too long, lest you wish to end up with a Shipwreck Kebab. I’ll explain that later.

7. Spread some mayonnaise over one side of the bread, and dash it with pepper to welcome the salsa stuffing.

8. Put some of the chicken on one side of the bread like so, roll it up and serve.

9. Dig in, as you listen to a voice whispering at you through your tongue that says “Welcome to Heaven. Please enjoy your stay.”

Ah yes, before I forget, I mentioned not to leave the bread on the fire for too long. While I was busying myself with the first roll, I totally forgot about the second bread I was toasting. Well, the bread didn’t hangus or anything. It just got that extra bit crispier, if you know what I mean. It tastes fine, but I end up with a Shipwreck Kebab. What’s a Shipwreck Kebab, you ask?

That, my young Padawan, is a Shipwreck Kebab. A fitting name, don’t you think?